Sunday, November 7, 2021

What It's Like To Be A Teacher in 2021.

Chris Bernholdt, in a still grabbed
from his TikTok account.

 I got this from my friend Chris Bernholdt,  (DadnCharge) who is an art teacher in Pennsylvania and a well known Dad Blogger and influencer.

I love the sentiments, and all of the conflicting information and demands on teachers (and it's absolutely similar for parents as well!  And students-- well fuggetaboudit!)

Chris says on his post that he got it from a friend, so I have no idea who really wrote it, but it's brilliant.

If you know who wrote it, I'd like to give them proper credit. 
Let me know in the comments who is the author, and I will praise them and point to them with awe.

I re-formatted it a little.  

What it is like to be a teacher in 2021

**Shared from a friend**

Me: Ok class, today...

Student: This is stupid. I'd rather be playing video games.

Office: *ring* Send (student) to the office.

Voicemail: My kid told me that YOU...

Email: We need you to sub on your prep.

Teacher coaches: Students are experiencing an all time level of trauma. Form relationships with all students and make connections every day.

SRSS: Make sure to incorporate ELA and math into your lesson plan daily, so we can boost our scores for data.

IEP: Implement these modifications and accommodations for these students every hour. Document it.

504: You are legally bound to adhering to these accommodations for these students. Document it.

Pinterest: Every teacher in the universe has a cooler and craftier idea and classroom than you.

Facebook: Omg. Did you hear about what happened in *insert teacher here* class?! Don't they even watch them? It's their job! How did (s)he miss that?! Yeah, and I heard...

Class roster: 30+ kids every hour, 6 times per day.

Student Services: You have 4 homeless students. You need to provide the following daily.

Student Medical alert: These students will die if you don't monitor these medical issues closely
Professional Development: We're trying something new this year even though we're not ready to roll it out and there's no funding for it. Be sure to document that you are doing it correctly.

Media: Your classroom is going to get shot up any minute.

Surprise observation: Be sure goals are set, reports are finished, lesson plans are perfect, and that you hit the learning target and success criteria multiple times. We need documentation and evidence that you're doing this.

Standardized tests: You suck as a teacher. Also, your rating is based on this, but also, make sure students don't feel defined by their performance on these.

PBIS: Teach students the expectations in the hallway, cafeteria, classroom, and outside. Take students in the bathroom and reteach how to wipe, flush, and wash hands. Be sure to only reward positive behavior. Check in and check out with these specific students daily.

MTSS: We have 3 tiers of support. What about your gifted students, pull out students, intervention students? Why aren't you providing enough differentiation? You need to provide documentation.

Door: Keep me locked, so that students are safe. Yes you will be interrupted to open me 10x per hour.

Papers/Grading: Say good bye to your evenings and weekends.

Lesson plans: Are they aligned with school, state, U.S., and world wide standards? Be sure to document that.

The Powers That Be: What can we do to help?

Teachers: Please take something off our plate before adding something new.

The Powers that Be: Sorry, no can do. Btw, you also need to...

Tech Dept: We are working on correcting today's issue as quickly as we can.

English Language Learner: *crying, speaking a foreign language, feeling alone and scared*

The Powers that Be: Sorry, there's just not enough funding for those students.

Department Heads: I've been told we need to align all of our curriculum, assessments, and daily lesson plans. Be sure to document that.

Staff Memo: Be sure to attend the following meetings this week: staff, grade level, core subject, tech, school climate, school improvement.

Counselors: We saw 500 of the 900 students on our caseload, this month.

Social Worker: Yes, I filed that CPS report and the other one. Now we wait on the state to act.

Student: My step dad got arrested last night for beating up my mom.

Tornado Drill: Surprise! Make sure all students are safe. Now go back to teaching.

Fire Drill: Surprise! Make sure all students are safe. Now go back to teaching.

Internal Threat Drill: Surprise! Barricade your door and make sure all students are silent for 45 minutes. Go back to teaching.

External Threat drill: Surprise! Make sure student are silent and out of the funnel of potential bullet spray. Now go back to teaching.

Tutoring: Provided before school, after school, and during lunch.

Technology: Must be implemented into all lessons but also make sure to monitor all 30+ students at all times and make sure they're not doing anything inappropriate.

Data: You suck as a teacher.

Administrators: *literally being pulled in 20 directions at once, everyday, while fielding discipline, making multiple teacher observations, fielding staff, breaking up fights, keeping us safe, performing investigations, cooperating with police, meeting with students and parents, and attending all after school and extracurricular activities*

Employability grade: Be sure to document when students are tardy, not following directions, unprepared, and not collaborating well. Document this for all 175 students.

Academic Grade: Document all accommodations, modifications, retakes, and rationale for grades for each of your 175 students. No we will not provide district time for you to enter these into your grade book.

Special Ed State Dept: You must mainstream all students regardless of behavior, cognitive function, and/or potential violent episodes. Sorry, there's just not enough funding for
additonal support in your classroom.

State: Make sure you are highly qualified, but you must pay for all of your professional development, student loans, grad classess, conferences, hotel stay, food, travel, and substitute teachers out of pocket. And you need to update your certification. You'll need to pay for that too.

Bladder: You haven't peed in 7 hours, you're going to get another infection.

Heart: *racing*

Stomach: *in knots and anxiety coursing*

Brain: You're not enough. You'll never be enough.

Chest/Lungs: I can't breathe.

Eyes: *leaking tears*

Me: *smiles* (Tells self) Stop. Just suck it up. You're fine. You have 30+ students eyes on you right now. Do NOT let them down.

Society: F*ck respect for authority, including your teachers. Must be nice to get your summers off.

Parent of a student: You make a difference.

Student: I know I'm special and have value, because of you.

My own kids: Dad, why are you crying?

Me: *sets alarm for tomorrow to do it all over again*

Wednesday, April 21, 2021

International Dad Jokes.

One of my brothers sent this meme/questionaire to me recently, and I have to say, I guess I'm pretty dad.

I guess I'm pretty darned dad.


Many of these "witticisms" are things I say on the regular   (Hmmmm, on the regular is not on this list.)

I looked this over with my 12 year old son, and we counted 8 on the list that he recognizes as mine, and those I  mostly learned from my dad.  I thought of them as loving nods to the way I was raised, but perhaps they are just incessant ear worms (memes for you younger folk) 

"Looks Like We'll have to amputate"

Actually, I just used a variation of this joke at the doctor in Spain.  My son had a slight fever (we think Strep, although the test came back negative.  It was not Covid.)  We visited the doctor twice. On the return trip, in my very bad Spanish, I asked as seriously as possible "Es necessito amputado?"  The doctor smiled, recognizing this apparently international dad joke.  

"Let's rock and roll"

I actually usually say "Let's rock and/or roll"  which is a reference to a Simpson's episode that I've long since forgotten.  I am also known to say "Let's G"  "Let's make like a tree and leave."  "Let's make like a bakery truck and haul buns."  and "Let's make like a hockey player and get the puck out of here."

"What's the damage"

When I do this, it's usually accompanied by a clown double-take when looking at the bill, or a Fred Sanford "It's the Big One Elizabeth" stagger while clutching my heart.  One day I might have an actual heart attack while looking at the bill, and then the joke will be on me.

"No, your other right."

I don't associate this with something I use as a dad.  This is a joke I almost exclusively use when teaching clowning and physical comedy to people.  It turns out, a lot of people (especially kids) don't know the difference between left and right, and just follow the cues of what the teacher is doing.  And since they are facing me, they actually do need to use the other right.  (Although sometimes I do demonstrate backwards, just to confuse them!)

"Just resting my eyes"

My dad used to say this all the time while laying on the couch watching a baseball game... and snoring.  I am not that far behind him really.  Well, I don't really watch baseball.  More likely to be watching Netflix or "Critical Role."

"That's how they get you."
This might be one of my most used expressions.  I don't just use it about warranties, I use it about nearly everything. Yes, I've turned into that jokey conspiracy theory dad. Of course they are going to get you.

I inherited a few other sayings from my dad that didn't make the list.

"Hands down by your sides-- like a soldier." 
If he was inspecting you to make sure you were properly dressed, or if you were trying to hide something, he'd say that.

"Pay attention- there will be a quiz later."
If you aren't looking or paying attention

"I gave him the one-five, the one-five, (he gave me the 2,3,4 back.)"

This was kind of a joke, because my dad had a very brief stint as a boxer. (at least that's what I've been told)  He was a tall thin guy at the time with extra long arms, and I guess that was attractive at the time.  He didn't like being hit, or hurt, so he quickly gave it up.  

So what did your dad say to you?  And what are you saying to your kids?  Let me know in the comments.

Saturday, March 6, 2021

The Race -Virtual Theatre- Extended March 13-28!

 I previously wrote about my friend Mark Binder's play, that had its World premiere via Zoom at the Wilbury Theatre Group in January. 

Read that article here.

It closed on January 31, but due to popular demand, it's being brought back from March 13-March 28.

Here's a video trailer for the play.

The Race - live theater that disrupts the zoomscape from Mark Binder on Vimeo.

In the play, two candidates (Mr. White and Mr. Black) are vying for a position.  One is white, and one is not (and during the course of the production, the actors change roles, so their name is NOT an indicator) As they are interviewed by an unseen third party (who may be a person, or an algorithm, or some strange amalgamation of the two) politics, race, bias, competition, complicity and computer mediation are all explored.  The questions are off-putting and relevant (and audience members can participate in the live chat and vote on some of the questions using Zoom's Poll feature)  And at the end of the show, the audience is invited for a talkback.

Don't miss the chance to see it!

Tickets are available at

The Race by Mark Binder features Rodney Eric Lopez (left), Jim O'Brien (right) and Jennifer Mischley (unpictured)  The actors change roles nightly, which adds to the interest of this production.

Tuesday, January 26, 2021

Virtual Theatre: The Race by Mark Binder: Wilbury Theatre Group Ends January 31

Yes, the pandemic has shut off traditional methods of producing theatre.  But there is always a way.  And sometimes that way actually expands the possibilities of your work.

My longtime friend (and accomplished storyteller and novelist) Mark Binder has a new play being produced by the Wilbury Theatre Group in Providence, RI.  The play is called The Race, and it uses the zoom platform effectively to simultaneously isolate and engage the audience.   

It's his first produced play in 20 years, It ends this weekend, it's gotten great reviews, and I urge you to see it. 

The Race by Mark Binder features Rodney Eric Lopez (left), Jim O'Brien (right) and Jennifer Mischley (unpictured)  The actors change roles nightly, which adds to the interest of this production.

In the play, two candidates (Mr. White and Mr. Black) are vying for a position.  One is white, and one is not (and during the course of the production, the actors change roles, so their name is NOT an indicator) As they are interviewed by an unseen third party (who may be a person, or an algorithm, or some strange amalgamation of the two) politics, race, bias, competition, complicity and computer mediation are all explored.  The questions are off-putting and relevant (and audience members can participate in the live chat and vote on some of the questions using Zoom's Poll feature)  And at the end of the show, the audience is invited for a talkback.

A behind the scenes look at The Race.  I recognize this desk as Mark's!  (photo by Mark Binder)

Because it's on Zoom, anyone in the world with $20 and a computer can see the show. (which expands the audience base.) And because it's DESIGNED to be consumed in the Video/streaming format, it suffers none of the typical issues that a play suffers when translated into video (poor lighting for video, bad camera angles, muffled sound, and a feeling of not being present in the room.)  

This is an interesting new way to look at theatre, and a well designed and enigmatic evening. The actors are great, the writing and directing are on point, and like all good theatre it raises as many questions as it answers.  Definitely see it if you can!

The Race by Mark Binder, directed by Brien Lang with original music by Nikita Zabinski, and features actors: Rodney Eric López, Jennifer Mischley and Jim O'Brien.

Three more shows available:   (click links to purchase tickets)

Friday, January 29, 2021  7:00 PM
Saturday, January 30, 2021 7:00 PM
Sunday, January 31, 2021  2:00 PM

To find out more about the show: visit

Read some reviews of the show:,158050

Tuesday, January 5, 2021

Relief for Out of Work Chicago Restaurant Workers!

Struggling Cook County restaurant, bar and coffee shop employees can apply to a relief fund that has more than $3 million to give to workers. The Southern Smoke Foundation, a Texas-based nonprofit, established the Chicago Restaurant Worker Relief Fund in August to help people who have been laid off or lost work as coronavirus restrictions limit restaurant service, but it has received limited applications and has more money to give out. The average grant is $2,500-$3,000.

Southern Smoke established the Chicago Restaurant Worker Relief Fund in August to help people who have been laid off or lost work as coronavirus restrictions limit restaurant service, but it has received limited applications and has more money to give out.
The average grant is $2,500-$3,000. To be considered for assistance for the Chicago fund, applicants must have worked in the food and beverage industry for a minimum of six months and an average of 30 hours per week. Applicants must be able to show proof of employment.
The foundation is vetting applications and prioritizing based on urgency.  Apparently, their grant team meets daily to approve and give away grants.
There is also the possibility of more funding: The private donor who started the fund is also matching up to $1 million in donations. If that goal is met, there’d be a total of $6 million in relief funds. 
If you like, you can donate to the fund here.
Since March, Southern Smoke has given close to $4,000,000 to over
2000 restaurant workers affected by COVID closures.

Southern Smoke was launched in 2015 to raise money for multiple sclerosis research and advocacy. The group shifted gears in the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey in 2017, providing financial assistance to workers in the food and beverage industry affected by the disaster. 
Apply for a grant

Saturday, October 10, 2020

My Failings As A Father and as a Person


Alexander the Great I'm not.
It's my birthday tomorrow, which always brings me a certain level of depression and frustration.  It's right around this time each year that I start to think about all the things I haven't accomplished, all the things I haven't done, all the things I wanted to do this year, and somehow managed to avoid.  

When I was in my 30's, my joke used to be "When Alexander the Great was my age, he'd been dead for five years.  He had conquered all of the known world.  I've finished making payments on my five-year-old car."  

Yeah, I know.  I have it good compared to a lot of people.  I'm still alive and without COVID (knock wood)  My wife still has her income, and I'm fortunate to continue to be a house-husband, stay at home dad,  and (sort of) pursue my goals as an artist. And I've accomplished a lot this year.  (Including shedding 70+ lbs, working out every day for a year+, and keeping it off during the pandemic!)  I've also taken three major workshops, attended a couple of conferences, joined a mastermind of sorts, live-streamed every day for a month, wrote every day in my blog for a different month, started playing D and D again, and produced almost 40 sonnet videos (although I've stalled the last few months) on my Daily Sonnet video project. 

So I've done some things this year, but not enough, not enough.  I'm feeling disappointed in myself that I didn't jump on the virtual show bandwagon, that I didn't miraculously monetize my sonnets, that the idea that I have for an online course now seems stalled.

Dark skies ahead.

But  I wasn't thinking about any of these things when I lost my cool with my son tonight, in a way that did not reflect my best self, my best intentions, or show myself as a good parent.  Instead I got pretty angry and frustrated.

My son has been having focus issues at school, particularly with math.  He is complaining all the time about school.  We have had to cut down his computer game time, and assiduously watch it, because he's lied about checking out game sites during the day, about doing his homework, and he's just putting in the absolute minimum effort to do his work.  He doesn't want to do what the teacher expects, which is to write down the problem and show his work.  He's downright belligerent about it.  And sadly, I can be belligerent too.

After online school today, my son came to my office to ask if he could download a video game and play with his friends FIRST before he did his homework.  Typically he has to do his homework first.  But all of his friends were playing now, and I want him to have fun. He said that my wife had left it up to me.   I said, okay, but afterward, you need to finish your homework and take a shower.  He agreed, and even pinky swore.  

That was at 2:30 pm.  I had a bunch of stuff to do, and was in my office working at 4:30pm when my wife called me to say that she was leaving to have a socially distanced dinner date with a girlfriend, and did the boy do his homework?  I went upstairs to check on him, and he (naturally) was still playing video games.  It turns out children are not self-regulating, and they need to be reminded to do the things they said they were going to do. I asked him to get off and start on his homework.  

He grumbled but said yes.  About 8 minutes later, he was off, and when I checked in on him 10 minutes later, and he hadn't done a single Khan problem.  He's just looking at the problems, and he seems a little dejected.

There's nothing on his notepad.  He hasn't tried it at all..  I ask him if he needs help.  He says yes. 

 I pull up a chair and say "Okay, what's the first problem?"  

He pulls it up on the computer.
I say  "Okay, what''s the first step? " 

He says  "I don't know.  This is stupid. I don't understand it all."

"What don't you understand?"


"Like what?"


I can't stand this kind of answer.  If you are having problems with understanding stuff, that's cool.  Math isn't easy, algebra isn't easy, you have to practice.  But when you haven't tried-- when you've put in zero effort, and then you ask me for my help, it is frustrating.   And then you start just making excuses, saying you don't understand everything, well, shut up.  It's not that you don't understand it.  It's just that you are refusing to try.

I try to show forbearance:  

 "The first step is: Write the problem down."
He says "I don't want to... I can't.  My fingers hurt.  I don't know where the sign goes, I can't multiply by a decimal. I don't know how to add or subtract."  And a dozen other excuses.  I chide and chide him. He finally writes it down.  He writes it extra big so that the problem takes up the whole piece of paper.

I say, "Okay, let me show you again how to do it."  I take the pad, and put it down, on the mousepad, moving the mouse slightly.

"AYYYYYYYYYYY!" he yells.  "Don't move the mouse!" 

"Why is it broken?"

"No, I just don't want it moved."  There's not enough space on the desk to make notes.

We go through this four times.  At this point, he wants me to just solve his problems for him, and he's pretending that he doesn't know how to add or subtract numbers.  Every time I try to show him, he is not paying attention, or he yells about me moving the mouse slightly.

He's telling me that he's stupid, that's why he doesn't get it, that he has a little brain, that he's not good at anything, he's not good at Minecraft.  I'm reassuring him that he's not stupid, I've seen him do this work before, he can do it.   But I'm not cheerleading him, it's not buoying him up.  He wants to get out of doing his homework and I don't want to be tricked or taken advantage of.  He's looking for sympathy, but I don't have a lot for him. We have been down this road many times before.

At this point, I know I need to show compassion, but I don't have any to give.  He hasn't met me a quarter of the way.

His obstinance and deliberate obtuseness is getting to me.    I say "Don't be lazy."  Then I regret telling him that.  I say, "I don't mean that you are lazy.  I mean that you are not doing the work you need to do, and now you are just being obstinate, hoping that the problem will go away. But it won't." 

Still no movement from him.  He's dug in.  I explain to him the options.   I tell him that I will take away his computer for the rest of the weekend.  I tell him he will have to sit at his desk until he finishes his homework.  He has three more problem sets to do.  It's 16 questions.  It will take him 15 minutes if he works at it, or it will take him three hours if he doesn't.  There's nothing else he can do. 

 Despite my best intentions, despite my desires, I've turned this into a power struggle, one I'm destined to lose.  

I'm trying to be patient with him.  I try to show him the problem again, he yells at me again about moving the mouse, I pick up the pad, and it brushes his face and "Ow!  You hit my nose!"  He won't let me work on the desk, so I bring him to  the kitchen table, and he puts his foot under mine and now "OWWWWW!  My foot hurts!  You stepped on my foot!"

I dealt with that, and brought him back to the desk.  I'm trying to persevere, I'm trying to show him how to write down the problem, and he yells about the mouse again.  In a fit of frustration, I clear all the stuff on the desk onto the floor with one sweep of my hand.  Everything clatters to the floor. I meant it to be "okay, let's clear the desk so that there's room to work within your ridiculous phobia about moving the mouse."  And yes, it was an overly dramatic gesture.

But that's not how it read to him.  (Of course.)   It came off as "I cleared this desk, and if you keep on making me angry, I'm going to clear you."  He gets frightened and runs into my bedroom.  I'm fuming at him for his obstinance and at myself for the way I've handled this.  Why can't I have more patience with him?  Why can't he just do the work, and save us this endless runaround?  Why do I care so much that he tries at his homework?  And why did I let him get to me?

He's barricaded himself in my bedroom, he's called my wife, she texts me to say, leave him alone, don't worry about the homework.  I text her to say I'm considering joining the French Foreign Legion.  Because I just want out.

I'm pissed.  I'm fuming.  He's played us again, he got to play video games, he didn't take a shower, he didn't do his homework, and I feel like a failure as a father.   I don't want any part of him, I don't want to hug him, or comfort him or find out what the problem is with his math.  My goodwill towards him is at zero, and I'm upset with myself that it bothers me so much.

I make my own dinner.  I toy with not making him dinner at all, and letting him fend for himself, but decide I can try to be the peacemaker.  He yells at me "Where's my food."  I give it to him, and we sit in silence, not looking at each other, not talking to each other.  I hate it, but I am not going to let him get the better of me.  I have to review an online show, so he goes back to my bedroom and watches The Good Place.  I don't say a word to him.


Self portrait as a frustrated dad.

My wife finally got home, and she soothed him a little bit, as she is capable of.  They watched TV in the bedroom.  I didn't want to go in there.  I watched my show and wrote this blog post, read the news, watched my own show, avoiding our bedroom, avoiding them.  He fell asleep in our bed, and I considered just not going to sleep, or sleeping on the couch.  But I went in and pulled him out of the bed and brought him into his own.  But I'm not tired and I don't want to sleep, and I feel like I need to share this post, even though it's not a good look for me.

I wish I had a better, happier ending to this story.  I wish I knew how to let it go, to let it roll off my skin like water off a duck's back.   But I don't.  Right now I don't even know how I'm going to let this go, and I know I need to, but I don't want to.   I'm disappointed in him, and I want him to know it.  And I'm disappointed in myself, and I don't know how to fix it. 

Happy Birthday to me.  And it looks like Alexander the Great is going to have the last laugh. His son became the Emperor

Tuesday, October 6, 2020

Sometimes Digital Learning Can Be Great!

 I've been complaining a lot about digital learning as of late.  It's not engaging, it's overly strict, the kids are too regulated, there's not enough playtime or downtime. 

During the digital lesson my son (aged 12, going on 26)  is either trying to shut off his video so he doesn't have to pay attention or sneaking discord/ chat messages with his friends.  (He's already gotten in trouble for arranging to play minecraft during Lunch time while using the school provided Google Chat!)  I have to go over his history with a fine tooth comb, and he's always pretty shifty.

After the lesson is over, I find myself either having to police my son to make sure he does his work, threatening him with lack of internet (do I have any other leverage these days?)  And when he manages to do his work, it's lackluster and/or just out and out wrong.   And he's cried and gotten angry more in the last three weeks than he did all summer, and I have to think that digital learning is at the root of most of that.  (Well that, and the onset of puberty!)

 Basically, my son hasn't had great experiences with digital learning thus far.   But there's hope on the horizon.

Brady Lea

My friend Brady Lea (fellow alum of Clown College and a brilliant playwright and theatre artist) teaches improv at the Ruth Asawa San Francisco School of the Arts, a competitive arts-based public high school.  She recently posted a fantastic story on her Facebook about one of her digital/ distance learning/ Zoom classes.  It was inspiring, and I wanted to share it here.  And she gave me permission to do so!  

The thing that is so great about this is that it shows when handled in just the right way, that digital learning can totally rock.  She gave the students some (pardon the pun) Lea-way, and they came through big time.

 I'm not sure how you could teach math this way, but maybe you could.  And if not this way, some OTHER way that follows the student's desires while still pushing them forward, using peer pressure in a positive way.

One of the things I love about this is that it's not about how great a teacher she is.  (although I'm sure she is)  As the story is told below, the real magic is in how Brady saw an opportunity and seized on it, and let the kids guide her.  And in the process, threw away her lesson plan, and her agenda. That's the kind of teaching (and learning) that makes a real impact.  I have no doubt that years from now, this little incident will be emblazoned in the brains of the kids who participated.  I know I'll be thinking about this moment of magic for some time.  And I wasn't even there!

Thanks for sharing, Brady!

Post by Brady Lea (all copyright by her. Reposted by permission)

I've posted an image of the facebook post below. If that doesn't work for you, I've also posted the text below that. All words by the wonderful Brady Lea.

If that image didn't come through, here's the text (again, reprinted by permission)

Warning: Long Post. (But entirely politics-free.) Follow up to yesterday's post about having a great zoom class. It was my first class teaching my material (have been doing other activities the last few weeks) with HS Juniors. I've had them for three years. It's a frustration to speak to a screen when a lot of kids are muted and/or have their video off. Especially teaching improv. We get no automatic feedback. As a comedy person, this is extra painful. 
Thanks to the many other generous teaching artists sharing lesson plans and tips for online teaching, I found a few tips on getting students engaged right off the bat. One was to admit nobody until there were 5-6 people in the waiting room. So I did that. Someone else suggested having the teacher's mic & camera off so they chat amongst themselves, something we really don't see much of. (Except them messaging each other on other platforms.) I waited for 5-6 more and then let that group in. They chattered away for 5 minutes, as I let in a few more people one at a time. 
I had been planning to just turn on my camera & mic then and start class, but also about that time, they started going, "Wait... where IS Brady." "Yeah, where?" Then they said some things I might be doing (nothing offensive-- ribbing me for my pet subjects.) I thought it was funny, and they were more engaged as a class on one thing than I'd seen in-- uhhh--since the before times. Eventually, someone said (joking-- I think) "What if something happened to her?" "Yeah, what happened to her."
At that point, I scrapped my warm-ups and wrote in the chat:


I really thought this would maybe get me 1 second of sarcastic laughter from ~16 yr olds. But they got into it, freaking out (schmacting) about my peril. Then I said:


And at that point they all (ok mostly) got into using tactics and mirroring and ensemble work to save me. They tried doing it psychically. They asked about my whereabouts. They all (but one) made a tube with their hands for me to crawl through. The Alien commander took over my chat and made the one hold-out participate. Then the commander demanded a sacrifice. Before they actually sacrificed one of their own, they were told it could be someone from their rival department. They had a name instantly. The commander then said he had eaten this kid. (YAY!) (We like him.) 
As the problem solved, trying to find the internal logic none of us knew, they also asked specific questions about the aliens to help further their rescue plans. How many legs? (6) How many arms? (3) What color? (Purple and green, based on my wee nephew's skin color chart.) Then they did the math to make sure every alien limb was accounted for.

 This had been 15 minutes of working together and narrative-building and it seemed like maybe I should start "real" class. I teach standing up from my kitchen and at that moment David Gallagher (spouse) came by. I told him to stand in front of my computer, and I turned on the camera. Students screamed. He spoke for a few seconds and then just moved his mouth while I dubbed his voice, claiming to be trying to take over his body and therefore escape. They used more psychic powers/telekinesis to blast him off the screen at which point I finally appeared. Much applause all around, and I praised the ensemble improv skills they showed. And then we started our grading period.

I had so much fun. So, thank you to whoever it was in whichever teaching theatre online group I'm in that suggested waiting until there were 5-6 of them before I let them in. Useful.

Sunday, October 4, 2020

Dad 2.0 Digital: The Takeaways

As mentioned in an earlier post, I spent this past weekend at the Dad 2.0 Digital Summit.  It was a three day affair, and overall was a great success, so I wanted to take a minute to celebrate the Dad 2.0 crew for creating a small intimate conference where men could meet, have heady discussions, share their writing, meet sponsors, and have an excellent time furthering the conversation of fatherhood.  

I have been to two or three digital conferences since the pandemic began, as well as EVERY Dad 2.0 Summit.  I'm a big fan of Doug French and John Pacini and the whole XY Media company that produces Dad 2, and I think they did a great job of adapting the original conference to a digital format while maintaining the spirit of the physical conferences.


At the closing toast, Doug and John asked for feedback on this new format-- what worked, what didn't- and  hinted that they expected that some of the innovations that occurred during the Digital Summit may make it into other summits (or that they may adapt the digital summit as a portion of their offerings)

For the most part, especially considering this was the first time they did it digitally, they did a fantastic job.  I had some minor ideas for tweaks, listed below.


The Programming.  I thought the programming was (as always) excellent.  Below this section I've gone through in greater detail about some of my favorite parts of the conference.  From a programming aspect, every aspect was well done.  The presenters were all great, and the fact that I got to go to everything (all on one track) was greatly appreciated.

Three panelists (and the moderator Doug French) from the Freelance Writing panel.

The Intimacy: I also loved the intimate nature of the event.  There were about 100 people registered, and I saw some of them on the first day, but most of the Zoom calls I saw had between 20-35 people on them.  Most of them were previous attendees, so I  knew most of them, but there were a few new guys (and at least one guy dialing in from France, and I think another from India!)   Very quickly, there was a good feeling in the Zoom chat, and lots of questions and puns and dad jokes throughout the event.

Tom & Lucy Riles
have a new book
available on Amazon

This was about 1/3 of the people who typically attend Dad 2.0.  This may not be enough people to make the conference viable, but the small number of people that were there made it feel very cozy and intimate feel like the experience we shared together was special.  I don't know what the top number of people would stop me from feeling that way.

The Comradery: More than the programming, I always love coming to Dad 2 for the comradery.  There's a good feeling in the room,  nobody's a real jerk, and people are very generous with their time, their energy, and their friendship.  This came through, especially in the happy hour, hosted by Tommy Riles and his wife Lucy , and the annual Dad Voices event, where people share their writing.  That's always a special part of the event, and it remained so in the digital version.


The sponsor activations
  There was an hour each day to meet with the sponsors, and it both wasn't enough (I had to cut about three meetings short to make sure I got to everyone so that I could get my special scavenger hunt code from them, to put me in the running to win an Amazon gift card (I am in the running, tied for first-- I think it will be a random draw)   and it was too much.  At most of the zoom rooms that I went to, I was the only person there, and the people jumped on me.  I'm not sure what can be done, but I did not feel like I got the same quality introduction/experience with the sponsors that I might normally get at the conference, and I'm guessing the sponsors might feel the same.   And even though I'm in the running for the prize for the scavenger hunt, not sure that I like the way it was handled.  
I think it could have been done in a more fun way. (see below for an idea)

Life gets in the way:  This is something else, I'm not sure how they could do it differently. Usually, when I go to a conference, I go somewhere else, and I have nothing else to do but go to the conference.  That's my full agenda.  Going to a conference while having to get lunch for my kid, take him to skating practice, help with his homework, do laundry, make dinner for the family, etc.-- all of those mundane things got in the way of me feeling even more engaged in the conference.  Perhaps if the conference were only one day long it would help.  (but then there wouldn't be the same kind of energy)

Add personal interactions:  I would have liked to see something added into the mix,  where you got to make more personal connections with people.  Maybe it's using the Zoom breakout rooms to discuss some of the issues, and then come back to the main session with your group's ideas? Or a scavenger hunt event, where there's a speed dating group to meet the sponsors, and your team wins sponsored prizes for a judged "interaction"  or quick video?  I would like more opportunities to hang out virtually with other guys and get to know them better.  If they could sign a chain restaurant sponsor (or a delivery sponsor) maybe that could happen over a small group lunch or dinner?)

These are minor quibbles. Overall, I had a great time, and can't wait to attend the next one.  

Wednesday, September 30, 2020

Dad 2.0 Digital Summit Starts Today!

 This weekend I was supposed to fly to California to attend the Dad 2.0 West Coast Summit-- an extra-annual conference where marketers, social media leaders, and blogging parents connect to discuss the changing voice and perception of modern fatherhood. 


This was one of the souvenirs from a previous 
Dad 2 Summit.  It turns out, it's now worth
beaucoup bucks!
I have the rather proud distinction of having attended EVERY SINGLE ONE of these conferences.

Read my recaps of previous conferences.

 I went to the first one at my wife's insistence-- I did have a dad blog, but I wasn't thinking about marketing, I was thinking about writing, but she wanted to go to Austin for South By Southwest which was happening simultaneously, and this felt like a good way to visit Texas and write off some family vacation expenses. 

 I loved that conference-- the community of guys, some of whom I was already reading, but many that I didn't know, and the diversity and breadth of writing talent and marketing savvy was palpable.     

And I even knew a few guys there! (it turns out that unbeknownst to me, my pals from the New York City Dads Group were also attending in Austin (and also have been to every event )  Talk about Kismet!

Since that time, I've visited various places, including San Diego, San Francisco San Antonio, Houston, New Orleans, Washington DC to be with my community of dad writers, marketers, and sponsors, and it's been an important part of my "Recharging process"  in terms of my parenting writing, and why I am even blogging at all.    And I've done some great events, met some great companies.  I even got some writing work out of it!

Dad 2
One of the cool events that I got to do as part of the Dad 2.0 Community. 
Tour the Meadowlands with Doug Flutie!

This year at the last conference at the end of February in DC, they announced that they would hold an additional summit this year in Los Angeles.  I signed up for it, although wasn't sure if October would be the best time for me to travel.  But I've been to every one of the summits, and I thought what the heck.   This wasn't exactly pre-COVID-  I remember being a little leery of my cab drivers and wondering who sat in the Lyft before I got in.  But it was definitely before the lockdowns, and the mandatory masking, and the implosion of social gatherings.


Dad 2.0 made the announcement this summer that they were going digital, and that my ticket would be good for both the digital conference and the next meat-conference they hold. I was happy because with COID I wasn't planning on traveling anywhere anytime soon. 

  The three days have been on my google calendar since March, but they were just marked off as three days.  Usually when I go to a conference I have traveled there, and I have NOTHING ON MY AGENDA except for the conference.  I am there, everything else is on hold.  This week, I need to fit in the conference in between my weekly D and D game, my son's skating practice, shepherding him through his homework and virtual classroom day, my wife's busy work schedule, and more.

 When my wife and I went over the weekly schedule, I said Oh, Dad 2.0 is this week.  She said, "Well, when will you not be available for looking after our son?"  Which was both a perfectly reasonable question and something to which I had no idea.  I don't typically plan out the conference until I'm on site.  When I went to the website to look at the schedule, I noticed something that makes perfect sense, but is also a stark reminder that no matter how connected we get, we won't be together.  

The Time Zone Change!  Although it was originally a west coast conference, all of the times for the official schedule are on Eastern Standard Time.  Since I live in a Central Time Zone state, I need to translate those in my head.  And there are guys attending from Europe who have to translate everything 7 or 8 hours.

Here's the schedule- and since this is my blog, I've conveniently translated all of the times to Central.  

Do the math in your own head!


All times in Central

Wed Sept 30

2:30 PM Newbie Seminar
8:00 PM Twitter Party

Thurs Oct 1
8:30 AM Fitness with Dai Manuel (Part 1: physical)
10 AM: Opening Doug French and keynote:
Michael Ian Black
11:45 AM: Marketplace- Sponsor Networking
1:00 PM Crafting the Counter Pitch
2:30 pm Hack Search and Grow Your Audience
 3:30 PM Build Your platform
4:30 PM Stay-at-home Influence
Friday Oct 2
8:30 AM Fitness with Dai Manuel (Part 2: mental)
10 AM Workshop
11 AM: Video gaming and Family entertainment 2020 trends
11:45 AM: Marketplace Live- Sponsor Networking
1:00 PM Raising Boys To Be Good Men
2:30 PM SEO Like a CEO
3:30 PM Podcast Marketing
7 PM: Happy Hour with Tom and Lucy Riles
8 PM: Dad Voices

 Saturday Oct 3
 8:30 AM Fitness With Dai Manuel (Part 3: Nutritional)
10 AM Workshop
11 AM Hiring A Virtual Assistant
12 PM How To Pitch Anything
1 PM Freelance Writing
 2:30 PM Closing Keynote & Closing Toast


It will also be interesting to interact with the sponsors.  Typically at a conference like this, you spend a lot of time in their booth, getting to know people individually.  Not sure how it will work digitally.  

They have a fair amount of sponsors.  In the past Dove Men+Care has been their major sponsor, but they decided to sit this one out.    Here's a list of the sponsors for Dad 2 Digital.  From what I can remember, most of these sponsors have not been involved with Dad 2.0 previously.  

Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament  (which is a bold move, considering that most of their locations are either not yet allowed to operate, or are not operating at even close to full capacity.)  I love this place, and actually reviewed their Chicago show back in 2015

Here's a video I took then of some of the swashbuckling and joustingaction.

GSK-Glaxo Smith Klein-- a global health care company. 

Intellivision Amico- A throwback to the 1970's is making a comeback, and are presenting a new platform for videogames  is still around, and they are reinventing themselves to play on the same field with XBox, Playstation, and Wii.  Very excited to find out more about this!

This looks like a fun platform for playing games!

  - the wipes that were invented by a dad.

Babo Botanicals - organic, soy-free, gluten free sun care products.

Bluehost- one of the top wordpress and web hosting providers.  

Connected Camps- a not-for-profit providing fun learning experiences that foster creativity, problem solving, collaboration and interest-driven learning.
 They use Zoom and Minecraft as platforms to teach.

Constant Contact- one of the leaders in online marketing.

LiceFreee!- A safe alternative to traditional chemical pesticide head lice treatment.

Mediavine- a full service ad management and monetization partner for bloggers.

Trane a maker of HVAC and home comfort equipment.

Fathering Together is a 501c3 that supports individuals who identify as fathers to become better parents and people.


There's still time to register for Dad 2.0!  To do so, visit and click the red register button.  

It's $99 for the digital conference only, and $149 to register for the digital conference and Dad 2 2021, wherever that might be in the physical world.

I'm not sure where it will be, but I'm pretty sure I will be there!