Monday, March 9, 2020

The Five Dimensions of Manhood

Larry Hagner, of the Dad's Edge Podcast.
At the recent Dad 2.0 Summit, I attended the podcast discussion where I listened to a number of interesting guys talk about their podcasts.  As part of that discussion, Larry Hagner, the driving force behind the Dad Edge podcast and the Good Dad Project, talked about what he called the Five Dimensions of Manhood.   (He was talking about what his content is about, and what he talks about, and he mentioned that all of his content falls into one of the following categories)

According to Hagner, there are 5 main dimensions of being a man (and I think that we could safely say for all people, although he focuses specifically on men)

Here are the Five Dimensions that Hagner outlined.

Hagner is also the author of the book
The Dad's Edge, available on Amazon.
1.  Health (including Physical, Spiritual, and Emotional)

2.  Work

3. Relationship with spouse/significant other

4. Relationship with children

5.  Finances

I was really intrigued by this cosmology, so I went back and listened to a couple of podcasts where he explains his idea more thoroughly.  (those podcasts linked below)

I listened to two or three podcasts with him on it, and for the most part, I like what he has to say.  He's well-spoken, thoughtful, and has great stories and insights.  In one of the podcasts, he says that everyone has a couple of core competencies in one of those five areas, but we all have deficiencies as well, and we need to be firing on all cylinders on all of them to be really happy.

I'm pretty sure these are NOT the Five Dimensions
that Hagner had in mind.
In another podcast, he talked about the fact that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with (outside our spouse and kids).  Another topic he talked about was how it's easy for a man to feel isolated and alone, to feel like he is spiraling out of control, and to take on all of the burdens of your family on your own, even though your partner might be ready to help.

[This is true for me for sure, even though my wife is the primary financial earner.  I still feel all of the financial pressure, as if it were my own.]

 All of what he said totally resonates with me.  However, I find that it is hard to separate what he is saying from the knowledge that he's selling an "answer" to your fears and ills, in the form of the Dad Edge Mastermind group, where for  $97 a month you get to become mastermind/accountability partners/friends with a group of other guys who will support you and help you and be your friend when the going gets rough.

I'm skeptical of the group part, and I am not planning on laying down any money to join an alliance of any kind.  Part of my skepticism is that I don't like being sold to, and part of it is I'm wary of group stuff like this.  I'm not much of a joiner, and when the answer seems to be "join our group for a fee"  I start to think about the money, and not wanting to be a sucker.  This could be either my superpower or my fatal flaw, depending on who you are talking to.

This is part of my problem.... I'm a Marxist!

Don't get me wrong, I've spent money on stuff before, and I know that the guys who have joined are grateful that they have.  He's had a few of them on the podcast episodes that i've listened to. 

While I can definitely imagine benefitting from being a member of the group,I can just as easily imagine myself having a terrible time with it.   And I'm not sure that I'm ready to take a risk like that to become part of the group.

If it were free, I'd probably try it, but it's not (and quite frankly, I can imagine that if it were free it would be terrible.  The guys you want in a group like this have to want to grow, and have to have some skin in the game.)

I guess what I'm saying is that even though I think I could benefit from something like this, I'm probably too much of a cheapskate to ever actually pay for something like this, for fear that I would be wasting my money.  This would fall under dimension number 5... Finances.  Which apparently I'm pretty screwed up about, and could benefit from being a member of a mastermind... (Whoa!! Catch-22!)

Are any of you guys members of a similar kind of mastermind (or even this one?)  Has it been helpful?  I'd love to hear your thoughts either here or via email.

And if you'd like to hear Hagner talk about his own ideas, you will very much enjoy what he has to say (and resonate with his honesty)


On The Dad's Edge Podcast

On Alanis Pratt's Intimate Conversations Podcast:

On the Unbeatable Minds Podcast/Videocast

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